It is a set of information given to the individual in order for the individual to make sense of his/her physical, emotional and sexual development, to create a healthy sexual identity development, to respect the rights and behavioral characteristics of the opposite sex, to have a perspective that helps him/her develop positive social relationships and to form positive value judgments.
Benefits of Sex Education for Children
Sexual Identity Development and Self-confidence
Children form their own sexual identity with the right education and approach. The self-confidence of the child who recognizes his/her own body and its characteristics develops positively in parallel.
Parent-Child Communication
Parents who do not hesitate to talk about sexual health with their children have the ability to discuss sexual development issues comfortably during their children’s adolescence.
Curiosity and Acquiring Knowledge
Children who receive answers to their questions at a young age from their parents as they should, satisfy their curiosity in the right way. And they do not hesitate to talk to their parents when they face any negative situation.
Children who are shamed by their parents and silenced when they have questions usually prefer to satisfy their curiosity on their own. In this process, they cannot distinguish between true and false information they encounter, they cannot have an idea about which ones are useful for them and they fall into insecurity.
Respect and Relationships
A child who completes the formation of sexual identity in a healthy way and recognizes the opposite sex learns to respect his/her own body and the opposite sex.
Children/persons who understand the difference between the two genders are more respectful towards each other and have a more positive and respectful attitude in their future relationships.
Trust and Social Development
Children who learn what they are curious about from their parents in the right way feel confident about themselves and their parents. This confidence increases children’s assertiveness in their lives and helps them work more efficiently and develop positive relationships in their social lives.
Adolescence
It is observed that children who are educated at a young age are more open to new information and can easily accept differences.
The right information given to children during puberty helps them to accept their physical changes more easily.
Prevention and Resistance
Children who are knowledgeable about sex education are more likely to reject any coercion or sharing of misinformation by peers or adults. They are better at resisting inappropriate offers and pressures.
How should sex education be?
Parent Education
Sexual education should start with increasing the knowledge of parents on this subject.
Parents should not hesitate to get expert information on this subject and read the right sources. It should not be forgotten that parents who learn the right parental attitude communicate more naturally and easily with their children on this issue.
Role Modeling
The first sexual education begins with modeling the bond of respect and love between the child’s parents. Respect, love, cooperation and sharing between parents enable children to develop equal attitudes towards both sexes. Otherwise, oppressive and violent attitudes between parents will cause girls and boys to model negative behaviors from their parents towards their own gender.
Gender Discrimination and Approach
Every parent should accept their child regardless of gender and not deprive them of their love.
You say to your children, ‘I wish you were a girl! Is this how a man behaves? You tomboy!!! Look at you, you look like a boy, a man doesn’t cry, stand up straight! Don’t laugh like a girl! Don’t be slow like a girl! Girls don’t talk much, shut up!’. This situation causes children to develop a negative perspective towards their own gender and the opposite gender and places a sexist approach in their subconscious.
Age-appropriate Information
Parents should not hesitate to talk about sex education with their children, and whatever questions they receive from their children, they should answer them correctly and in an age-appropriate way.
They should not condemn or belittle their children for their questions.
Special Zones and Touches
They should inform their children about their private parts after the age of 3. They should be informed that we have private parts of our bodies, that we cannot use these parts of our bodies to play games, and that we should not allow others to play games on our bodies.
Explain what good and bad touch is. It should be conveyed that good touch can be hugging a person we love, but if someone wants to hug or touch him/her in a way that he/she does not like, he/she should express that he/she does not want to and should prevent it. At the point where he/she cannot prevent it, he/she should be told to tell an adult about the situation. The child should be informed that this should not be kept secret.
Physical Contact and Boundaries
Care should be taken to ensure that these conversations do not cause anxiety in the child and increase his/her fear and insecurity.
In addition, parents should not try to force their children to kiss/pet them, saying ‘my daughter/son, stop, auntie will pet you’…
They should respect their children when they express that they do not want to be touched. Not respecting children and forcibly hugging and kissing them will make it difficult for children to distinguish between good and bad touch.
They should not support their children to show their genitals to others and make them present this behavior as normal. Approaches such as ‘come on son, show your penis to the uncles, oo look at my son, my boy!!!’ again trigger a sexist approach perspective in children. This is thought to trigger exhibitionism in individuals in the future!
Do not kiss your children on the lips, dear parents. Your child will perceive kissing on the lips, which you see as a sign of love, as normal and will cause him/her to be unable to distinguish bad touch from those who want to abuse him/her.
Children who are informed by their parents will know how to approach any negative situation and will try to prevent abuse. They will not be afraid to talk about it to their families and will feel safe.
Bibliography
Sexual Education of Children: An Overview from the Past to Present, Fatma ÇALIŞANDEMİR* Saniye BENCİKİsmihan ARTAN* Hacettepe University; Education and Science 2008, Vol. 33, No 150